Friday, October 31, 2008

Story of Christian Day 1,2

Continued Story of Christian
The first 2 or 3 days of Christian's life were a little blurry because of the fact that I was in PICU (ICU for pregnant or just had a baby ladies) because of my preeclampsia. I could not have visitors, watch TV, get excited, be exposed to light, etc due to blood pressure. I did get to hold Christian day 1 and 2 (they actually wheeled my entire bed in to the NICU) and then I got a fever day 3 and 4 and couldn't go in to the NICU. It was heartbreaking to watch my son thru a glass window in the hallway. But looking back I do believe God was just making me heal so that I could care for him fully in the days to come.
So back to Christian-- day 1 they found that he had Ebstein's Anamoly(heart defect that never goes away) and a murmur. No surgery would be required at this time. The cardiologist was sitting on the edge of my bed telling us all of this and as he would talk the bed would bounce a little -thus causing a woman who just had a c-section to have extreme pain. I just kept thinking "get off the bed, please get off the bed". He's a wonderful doctor though!!! The next day I will never forget and it seems like it was just yesterday. One of the neonatologist came to our room and told us that Christian had brain bleeds and a cyst. Apparently he had a stroke while inside me. All I heard was brain and there is a problem. It doesn't take long for it to sink in that your new precious boy has brain damage. After the doctor left the room Eric and I just cried but it was at that moment we could be angry or we could fully turn to God. We chose the latter. Right then we prayed and the scripture "I will never leave you or forsake you" was layed on my heart. At that moment we knew that God was with us and never leaving. I later noticed a notecard on my fridge with a scripture on it and guess what that scripture was Deut. 31:6-Be strong and courageous , Do not be terrified or afraid of them for the Lord your God is with you HE WILL NEVER LEAVE YOU OR FORSAKE YOU. I've had that on my fridge since college and all along God knew I was going to need that scripture. I know one thing for sure on that day when we recieved the worst news, God was with us and that peace that passes all understanding!
to be continued

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