2 different deliveries-Same outcome

In my last post I was 7 months pregnant with Bryant and now he has joined the world and is 3 weeks old. I thought I would post one of my personal stories. Several friends had asked me the question of "are you nervous?" "are you excited"?-all in reference to Bryant's soon arrival. My honest answer was no I'm not nervous (as in something may go wrong) and I'm not going to be fully excited until he is here and everyone is healthy. And those are my answers because I used to be one of those pregnant women who figured everything would turn out fine but after Christian was born I joined the "things can go wrong-even at the end of pregnancy" club. I"m a realist. So I couldn't get fully excited until I knew Bryant was o.k. Otherwise I did not spend 9 months worrying about it. I knew that no matter what God was in control of the outcome. Plus we already know what to do with a child with special needs!

Christian's Delivery

So I will let you in on what the delivery of Christian was like. I hope that you do not see this as a sad thing but just the experience of 2 different deliveries and where I'm coming from with this post. The morning he was born we went to the hospital because he was not moving and I just knew something was "off". Once we got to labor and delivery they discovered that I had preeclampsia (to fix this you deliver the baby)(complications to me could be siezure and stroke) and Christian was in distress. When laying there I thought please just let there be a heartbeat. When I heard his heart beating on the monitor it was a huge relief and I thought ok he's alive and everything will be fine. The nurses said he would be born today by inducing or csection. Five minute later they came in and said your having a csection right now! I still thought things were going to be ok. They took me to the O.R. and everyone was rushing around. Laying on the operating table I was thinking man this table is so narrow! Why I was thinking that I do not know:) When they pulled Christian out he was blue and never cried. I waited for that cry as the next signal that he was ok and it never came. I still thought maybe he just isn't a cryer. Several years later I realized that I felt like I was robbed of that monumental first cry. I guess it was easier to keep giving him chances in my mind for him to be ok. There was no emotions , no joyful tears. I mostly was just waiting-waiting for a cry, waiting to see him, waiting for the nurses to say things like ohhh he's cute or just anything normal. I finally saw him and kissed him before they took him away. We would later discover the medical problems that Christian had and the fact that if we would have waited he may not have made it. The days to follow were not filled with flowers, guests, celebrations, or joy. I couldn't have visitors due to my condition and Christian was in the nicu. I mean you can't expect freinds and family to come see you and be all happy and saying the typical happy phrases that are said at the new arrival of a baby. We were thrown in to a medical world of machines, medicine, tests, and diagnosis. Don't get me wrong Eric and I were extremely in love with our little boy and happy to have him in the world-it just wasn't the beginning we pictured.

Bryant's Delivery

In complete contrast, we had a scheduled day and time that Bryant would arrive. We packed our bags, showed up on time, and followed typical procedures. It's only now after Bryant's birth that I see how different Christian's delivery was. Even the order they get you ready for the csection was different, of course because it wasn't an emergency surgery. I'm sure the nurses wondered why we were not extremely excited before delivery. I would say we were both just quiet because we were waiting for Bryant to arrive and finally know that he was healthy. This time I went to the O.R and knew the nurses in there and saw my doctor ahead of time and even sat on the operating table and waited for the spinal block. I watched them prepare the equipment. It was so much more relaxed in the O.R. than the first time. I noticed how white the room was and big, very big. There were definitly less people in the room than before. It was time--Bryant was ready to come out and the doctor says "he's got black hair"! I smiled and couldn't believe it. The fact that she commented on something so simple was so precious because that's what was supposed to happen. Phrases/comments about your baby! We didn't experience that with Christian. And then the moment came when Bryant started crying!!! This was the moment I never had before. It was the sound of life, sound of "he's ok", sound of joy! It was a first for us. We were able to watch them weigh and clean him and Eric was able to hold him and he wasn't rushed away for anything. He came to recovery with us and it was just wonderful and amazing. There was emotion and relief! I could be fully excited!! This time the next 4 days were filled with guests, flowers, well wishes and normalcy. At one point Eric and I commented that this was so easy! We thank God for Bryant's health and safe delivery!

I thank God for the outcome of my 2 different deliveries----2 amazing, unique, loved little boys! The miracle of life comes in many different packages!

Pics of Christian and Bryant (on the way)

My friend Jenica tooks some precious pictures to remember the pregnancy. She did a great job! Thanks!

Christian is doing great. We are on day 87 of the diet and he is down to about 4-8 seizures a day. We are excited about that. He is much more vocal! Let's us know he is Hungry Now!!

School is going well. He seems to not dislike it so that always a plus! It's still hard to let others work with him when I've done that everyday for 3 and a half years.

It's odd to think that soon I will have 2 sons to love. I know that Christian and Bryant will learn lots from each other. It will be odd to see 2 in the backseat or say I have boy(s) instead of a boy. Eric and I can't wait to spread the love.

Summer pics and diet update

Christian had a great summer of swimming and swinging! His favorites!

We are on day 67 of the ketogenic diet to help reduce his seizures. I am HAPPY to report that he is now only having 7-12 a day! That's down from 30 before we started the diet. We hope that the numbers keep going down. Enjoy the pics and videos.

Going to Preschool

Christian also started preschool in Ozark. His teacher, para's , and therapist are great. He seems to enjoy but we have noticed a little more crying at unfamiliar voices. Not at school but at home. I think he thinks i'm going to leave him. At least he doesn't cry at school. There is a picture with his backpack on.

Day 24 of diet & future events

Well Christian has adapted well to the diet. He is his old self again. We have been running 12-18 seizures a day for the past six days. Hopefully this is a sign of more reduced number of seizures. I'm willing to go a month and a half now that we are seeing some kind of reduction.

3rd Annual Dodging to Make a Difference Dodgeball Tournament
-date and place to be announced. There is a chance we may not be able to have it at Upper Elementary due to the fee they are charging. Also Bryant Elijah( our son on the way) is due around dodgeball time so we are still waiting on the date of tournament. Either i will be very pregnant or have him strapped on me in a carrier:)

day 6 of diet and hospital story

This is Christian day 1 of diet in his stander with his iv pole beside him. We had him stand and wheel around the halls for a change of scenery.

well here is the update-this is easier to implement at home! we are able to get his fat in his diet with oil, butter and mayo so he doesn't have to just drink the heavy whipping cream. he was refusing it and throwing it up the last day at the hospital. i think it was just too much for his stomach. he seems to be getting back to the "old christian". the first few days he just wasn't smiley and happy like usual. the seizures have not reduced any but it's still early.

My hospital story---
So something always happens when we have a hospital stay or visit that leaves me with a funny, sad, or emotional story to share. This story i would categorize under the "o dear, i need some help" category. So here we go. . the last day the nurse takes his iv out and it's not bleeding so she just puts a band-aid on and no big deal. . .except that 45 seconds after she walks out i look down and blood is oozing out of the band-aid everywhere. so i can't reach the call button for help and i have started to collect the blood in my hand(so as not to get on Christian's nice shirt he's wearing) that is not holding christian. i basically have him with one arm and sitting on my legs. i "squat/walk" to the hall and yell for help. the blood is cupped in my hand and spilling out by now. luckily our room is right across from the nurses station. a med student hears me the second time and pops her head out and i'm telling her i need help(as if it's not apparent by a 5 mth pregnant mom squatting in the hall with blood dripping on the floor from son's arm). she yells for the nurses and walks away. thank you med student for at least yelling for the nurses. so then our nurse and several others come to take him and stop the bleeding. I was i'll admit kinda crying and saying "i couldn't reach the button". the nurses were wonderful and stopped the bleeding. there was no big crisis just lots of blood! lesson learned-l1)et the blood just drip on the floor and use other hand for holding child. 2) yell louder 3)apply pressure to bleeding 4)umm probably don't worry about nice shirt:))

day 4-going home!

yeah today we go home! they are nice here but you know it's always easier not living in one room. Christian is starting to smell like greasey fat. uhhh. i think it is seeping out his pores. they will take some final labs before we leave and hopefully we will leave after lunch.

Day 3 on diet

I knew something was off when i walked in the room and eric was holding christian with no shirt on and they both looked tired. Christian threw up at 4 am all over everything. That was apparent by the stench in the air. I'm sure all this fat is a schock to his stomach. Not that big of a deal but not a fun early morning for daddy! thank you eric for dealing with that while i slept at the Ronald Mcdonald house. Luckily they went back to sleep after that. So after a bath and load of laundry we hit the morning running.

Christian is on his full meal menu that we will go home and continue with. He's doing well with the food. A little more no his happy self but that could be just not being at home and having an iv and pricked finger for sugar checks. He has walked in his walker a little.

Seizures
Seizure count was the same yesterday and today by 2 his count was at 9. So that's not bad. Hopefully they will continue to decrease. I probably won't be able to update as much once i'm home but will try to weekly.